10 Things to Think About When Considering Separation

Wanting to leave a relationship can be an emotional, isolating and lonely time to live through. 

Keeping a rational, clear head can be a big ask, so here's a ten-point checklist to help you focus and cope with the process.

Here are 10 things to think about when Considering Separation

1. What is happening? Is your current unhappiness due to a specific instance (a fall out during the pressures of Christmas) or a culmination of events over a longer period? Is your desire for change a reaction to a particular issue that could be discussed or the result of something bigger?

2. It's good to talk Have you a friend or relative you can confide in to get your thoughts out in the open and help put your feelings in context?

3. Get some advice At this stage, you could see a solicitor to discuss legal options or mediation. We offer a free initial 30 minute consultation.

4. MoneyThink about you and your partner’s salaries, outgoings and assets such as property, investments and pensions. Do you need to protect your accounts? 

5. Home Who owns the property in which you live?  Is there a mortgage? How is that paid? Would you want to stay in the home or find somewhere new?

6. Children Often the most emotionally difficult aspect of separation to think about, in the event of separation, what living arrangements would keep their life as normal as possible.

7. Legal Support If you make the decision to separate and/or divorce, see a solicitor with the information you have gathered and thought about so far.

8. Options As well as Mediation, there are a number of alternatives to court proceedings that can save time and money – arbitration, collaborative law. Make sure you are aware of all the options open to you by obtaining advice from your solicitor.

9. Court If the situation cannot be resolved, you should seek legal representation from your solicitor who will be able to advise you as well as communicate and carry out court proceedings on your behalf.

10. Costs Make sure you know how much the process you choose will cost and how or who will meet these fees, right from the start. Your solicitor should offer a fix fee for divorce and talk to you about any extra costs before they begin their work.

If you'd like to discuss any of the items in this article, Verisona Law offers free confidential advice via the telephone or in person. Contact our Family Law team today on 02392 1000.

Our Family Law team

Sara Fildes

Sara is an established senior solicitor with twenty years’ experience in all aspects of family law.

After studying Podiatric medicine and working for the NHS for several years, she made a career change in her late twenties to enter the legal profession. After finishing her studies at Nottingham Law School, she began a training contract in 1998 at The Owen Kenny Partnership and joined its Family Team as a permanent, fully qualified solicitor two years later.

‘I am sure that my years of caring for patients, listening to their concerns and trying to work out the best possible solution contributed to my aptitude for family law,’ explains Sara. ‘I have always enjoyed advocacy, felt comfortable in a courtroom, but work very hard to find a practical and cost effective solution at the earliest stage. I find using a wide range of skills helps achieve the most amicable and well thought through settlements, saving stress and expense.’

Sara specialises in advising on all matters relating to relationship break down and family disputes and has particular experience in dealing with high networth separations, complex financial affairs and sensitive issues regarding children.

T: 023 9224 6711

Jane Wheeler

 Jane is a Solicitor in the Family team at Verisona Law.

After a successful twelve years in the fitness industry Jane decided to change careers. She attended the University of Southampton from 2005-08 where she obtained her law degree.

In 2010, Jane was offered a position as a Trainee Legal Executive at a firm in Portsmouth in their litigation department. After a couple of years she moved to a firm in Whiteley where she initially worked in the firm’s personal injury department. In 2014 Jane set up and ran the firm’s Family Law department, whilst studying CILEx part-time. Still keen to become a solicitor Jane attended the Legal Practice Course at the University of Law in Guildford from 2016-17.

Jane joined Verisona in May 2017 to help Verisona Law's family clients. She qualified as a Chartered Legal Executive in June 2017 and then as a Solicitor in April 2018.

T: 023 9224 6714

M: 07584 305 768


I went to Verisona Law because I had been unsatisfied with two previous attempts with other firms. Verisona gave that real sense of service, made.me feel like a client they were happy to assist at all times and ultimately gave the BEST advice and guidance. Dont waste money; go to Verisona FIRST!


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